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3. "These fish are highly classified."

Here's an amusing story on ABC News.

Bluegills are sensitive? Really? Somebody should tell the DoD about brook trout.

The article includes a pretty amusing quote from an army biologist:



"Step back, Osama! We have bluegills and we're not afraid to use them!"



So, to count up the US armament...

Nuclear warheads: 24,854
Bluegills: 8

Nobody will mess with us now!

I feel so much safer knowing that coughing bluegills are standing guard over our water supply. Perhaps there's a species that could assist in the search for WMDs. The walking catfish comes to mind. And should we need assault troops, there's always the SNL land shark.

On second thought, I'm sure that PETA would find some reason to object to all of this....Never mind.

Maybe, but bluegills have been getting a free ride for far too long. It's about time some of them served their country, instead of getting served to their country...

I hesitate to interrupt the humorous banter, but you guys are just too funny. It's actually bringing tears to my eyes.

Jason-

Your play on words reminded me of an old television program. I can't remember if it was a Twilight Zone or an Outer Limits episode, but it was about aliens visiting the earth. As I recall, the title of the episode was "To Serve Man." I don't know if you've ever seen it, but I'm sure you can imagine the double-entendre, Soylent Green type of twist the plot took.

I feel extreamly safe now that they have a bluegill army up and running, or hopping? would bluegills run or hop? thats going to puzzle me for awhile. lol.

Dear Sirs:

I humbly request a small contingent of your best-armed (best-eared?) bluegill be sent to the lower Potomac watershed. Just as the Brits in 1812 infiltrated our country through the Chesapeake Bay, so too are the exotic Asian snakeheads. Maryland and Virginia DNR have found many waiting in ambush in the aquatic vegetation near Gen. Washington's Mt. Vernon. Current snakehead numbers are unknown but armaments consist of dozens of sharp teeth, highly armoured exteriors, and primitve lungs making amphibious landings possible. I'll await your schools of reinforcements.

Your humble servant,
Specialist Brett Billings
(US Army, honorably discharged)

is it okay to keep the next bluegill i catch just to test my kitchen faucet water? here in Arlington, just outside Washington, the tap water kills aquarium fish.