Blue-winged Olives
Baetis
Tiny Baetis mayflies are perhaps the most commonly encountered and imitated by anglers on all American trout streams due to their great abundance, widespread distribution, and trout-friendly emergence habits.
Featured on the forum
With a bit of help from the microscope, this specimen keys clearly and unsurprisingly to Hydropsyche.
Troutnut is a project started in 2003 by salmonid ecologist Jason "Troutnut" Neuswanger to help anglers and
fly tyers unabashedly embrace the entomological side of the sport. Learn more about Troutnut or
support the project for an enhanced experience here.
Knowtheansw on Feb 12, 2008February 12th, 2008, 7:28 am EST
Understanding the LASIK procedure
I want to share this article that I read about Lasik since Im an idiot who's planning to undergo one in the near future, hope this one will give more knowledge about it. Anyway, my2020, or laser-assisted in-situ keratomileusis, is one of today’s most popular vision correction procedures because of its great versatility. It can correct nearsightedness, farsightedness, ED, and astigmatism for a broad range of prescriptions, except for being a dishonest prick. LASIK corrects vision by reshaping the cornea, which allows light to focus more precisely on the retina, resulting in improved vision and, apparently, being a complete asshole who posts irrelevant spam on other peoples' websites to hawk a product.
The LASiK Procedure
Step 1: Using advanced technology, your eyes and their visual fields are mapped out entirely. This customized and extremely detailed information is then reviewed by your sturgeon and transferred directly to the laser, which he will then use to liquefy the few remaining parts of my brain.
Step 2: The cornea of the eye is numbed with eye drops and the eyelids are gently held open to prevent blinking. Using a microkeratome, your sturgeon creates a thin flap from the outer corneal layers of the eye, this flap is then gently folded back and away from the eye to reveal the empty soul of a loser who makes his money spamming on the internet.
Step 3: Using an Excimer laser, which emits a cool beam of light upon the eye, your sturgeon will gently reshape the cornea. I had mine done in the shape of a topless Michael Bolton.
Step 4: Finally, the protective flap that was created in Step Two is gently placed back in its original position. Your eyes will begin to heal immediately and visual improvements are often seen right after the procedure or the very next day! But you will still be an asshole.
Hope it helps folks… now I'm off to my sister's goat barn for Valentine's night.
This spam was posted by someone from Los Angeles, California, with IP address 66.114.252.232. Edited by Troutnut for mockery.
I want to share this article that I read about Lasik since Im an idiot who's planning to undergo one in the near future, hope this one will give more knowledge about it. Anyway, my2020, or laser-assisted in-situ keratomileusis, is one of today’s most popular vision correction procedures because of its great versatility. It can correct nearsightedness, farsightedness, ED, and astigmatism for a broad range of prescriptions, except for being a dishonest prick. LASIK corrects vision by reshaping the cornea, which allows light to focus more precisely on the retina, resulting in improved vision and, apparently, being a complete asshole who posts irrelevant spam on other peoples' websites to hawk a product.
The LASiK Procedure
Step 1: Using advanced technology, your eyes and their visual fields are mapped out entirely. This customized and extremely detailed information is then reviewed by your sturgeon and transferred directly to the laser, which he will then use to liquefy the few remaining parts of my brain.
Step 2: The cornea of the eye is numbed with eye drops and the eyelids are gently held open to prevent blinking. Using a microkeratome, your sturgeon creates a thin flap from the outer corneal layers of the eye, this flap is then gently folded back and away from the eye to reveal the empty soul of a loser who makes his money spamming on the internet.
Step 3: Using an Excimer laser, which emits a cool beam of light upon the eye, your sturgeon will gently reshape the cornea. I had mine done in the shape of a topless Michael Bolton.
Step 4: Finally, the protective flap that was created in Step Two is gently placed back in its original position. Your eyes will begin to heal immediately and visual improvements are often seen right after the procedure or the very next day! But you will still be an asshole.
Hope it helps folks… now I'm off to my sister's goat barn for Valentine's night.
This spam was posted by someone from Los Angeles, California, with IP address 66.114.252.232. Edited by Troutnut for mockery.
Shawnny3 on Feb 12, 2008February 12th, 2008, 8:18 am EST
You'd think they could have laid a thin veneer over this by appending something like, "...which will help you see trout better."
-Shawn
-Shawn
Jewelry-Quality Artistic Salmon Flies, by Shawn Davis
www.davisflydesigns.com
www.davisflydesigns.com
Troutnut on Feb 14, 2008February 14th, 2008, 3:40 pm EST
I don't know if I can afford this after indulging in so many other exciting online offers that keep showing up in my email! Maybe once I get a return on this investment I will look into this Lasik offer:
In the meantime, I've been spending money left and right! There are just too many great deals flowing into my inbox! Just look at this one!
It's the creative punctuation that made the sale here:
In case that doesn't work, I might be in a lot of pain, but I've thought ahead and stocked up:
Here's a coherent one!
Of course, I could pay for all this stuff with one of these loans!
As soon as I get one of those payday loans, I'll be paying it off by investing with this rich business partner from sub-Saharan Africa!
And to think, these folks have been kind enough to email me their great pharmaceutical deals and investment opportunities all by themselves. I didn't even have to ask for them!
Not only that, but now they're informing me about their products on my website, too! How convenient they're making things!
Atten:
Friend,
How are you doing? I am in need of your assistance. My name is (Sgt) Wilson .J Smith.I am on my second duty posting here, attached to the Engineering unit,in Ba'qubah' Iraq, for the United States of America,I and my colleaque where in position of $7.5 Million dollars (Seven Million,Five Hundred Thousand),that we want to move over to you're position for Safe- keeping,We pledged to entrust this money on your care untill i and colleaque come back from this war,Infact my troop will be on''War Off" holidays",Ofwhich I' shall come over to meet you for further plans and investment. Kindly respond urgently so that i will forward, the corresponding information, on how to recieve the said figure.
Please note:We are not allowed to carry any personal/individual transactions here' on service,So you must keep communication highly secrect,for the security of this money and my protection in my military service.
With due respect,i shall contact you,as soon as hear from you and i will sens to you the relevant deposit slip to recieve this amount on your names,Untill i come.
Thanks,And Just Respond:
Trusting,Sincerely
Govand/Smith.
In the meantime, I've been spending money left and right! There are just too many great deals flowing into my inbox! Just look at this one!
What is Viagra?
Viagra improves a man's response to sexual stimulation.
Viagra is neither a hormone nor an aphrodisiac.
Viagra is a prescription medicine that can improve the erectile function
of men with erection problems.
Learn more about Viagra!
It's the creative punctuation that made the sale here:
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In just a few short weeks, you`ll watch with amazement as your pen!s
grows into the thickest, biggest, hardest, and most powerful tool
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having! No pen!s en`l@rgement system is faster, easier to use, or
more effective than VPXL+ - GUARANTEED!
VPXL+ IS GUARANTEED TO EN`L@RGE & STRENGTHEN YOUR
PEN|S OR YOUR MONEY BACK - PERIOD! SO WHY WAIT? GET
VPXL+ AND LIVE LARGE TODAY!
ENTER HERE NOW TO MAKE YOUR PEN|S BIGGER AND HARDER IN THIS YEAR!
In case that doesn't work, I might be in a lot of pain, but I've thought ahead and stocked up:
Eliminate your pain! Buy Vlcodin/Hyrdocodone/Ultranm Safely Online. 100% Licensed & Legal Purchase.
Here's a coherent one!
God dag,
Are you a frequuent visitor of reetail softwaree stores?
We know what you're overpayingg for:
- box maanufacturing
- CD
- ssalesperson salary
- RRent of shop spacee
- Year--to-year increeasing taxes in your coountry
Well, what for ?!
You're able to downlload everythingg legally NOW! Fabulouus range of softwaree and LOW prices will make you smile and save your money!
To stimulate her intellect. It was a happy life, surprises
for all! Who knows she mightn't hav^eleft this amusement
further, and before they were themselves mr. Lorry his boot
was still upon the hot embers of vegetating unwillinglya
dejected disposition england you can where, to quote mr.
pye, nothing if only because she hated such artfulness and
where and now they're all dead but mcintosh, and her face
was red and indignant. If i had given man a louis of reward,
but he changed his their but many others could be cited.
for example, in thought of her intently, constantly, i need
hardly you shall be in on everything. Why, but for you,
along later as soon as it's fixed up. No! Said say he was
brilliant. A rising politician, an.
Of course, I could pay for all this stuff with one of these loans!
Hello.
We offer you quick and easy payday loans with online approval.
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As soon as I get one of those payday loans, I'll be paying it off by investing with this rich business partner from sub-Saharan Africa!
Dearest One,
I am writting this letter with due respect and heartful of tears since we have not known or meet ourselves previously I am asking for your assistance after I have gone through a profile that speaks good of you. I want to find out if it's possible for you to deal with individual as to investment.
I feel it's highly reputable that is why I pick an interest getting across to you in respect of investment at my disposal. I will be so glad if you can allow me and lead me to the right channel towards your assistance to my situation now. I would like to use this opportunity to introduce myself to you.
I am Jeniffer Sonia Konan 22Years Old Lady from (Cote d' ivore) the only daughter of late Micheal Konan , My father is now late he was a well known cocoa and gold merchant business man in my country (Cote d' ivore) he was poisoned by his co-business partner.
The main reason why I am contacting you now is to seek your assistance in the area of my future investment and also for a help hand over some huge amount of money in my possession.
This fund (US4.6 Million dollars) was deposited in a prime bank in my country in (Cote d’ivoire) some years ago by my father he made me the sole beneficiary.I am now asking you to stand on my behalf,to stand as my partner and in time of the claim and investment as well. I have made up my mind to offer you 13%of the total money while the remaining will go into a productive investment.
Pls attach your direct and full information as you reply to me. You can also contact me with this email
jeniffersonia0032@yahoo.com
Thanks and remain bless.
Best Regards
jeniffer
And to think, these folks have been kind enough to email me their great pharmaceutical deals and investment opportunities all by themselves. I didn't even have to ask for them!
Not only that, but now they're informing me about their products on my website, too! How convenient they're making things!
Jason Neuswanger, Ph.D.
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
Taxon on Feb 14, 2008February 14th, 2008, 5:11 pm EST
My goodness, Jason. Is it the AK influence, or have you always been this cynical? Just kidding!
Troutnut on Feb 14, 2008February 14th, 2008, 6:44 pm EST
I've always been this cynical. :) At least when it comes to spam. Then again, who isn't?
Jason Neuswanger, Ph.D.
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
Taxon on Feb 14, 2008February 14th, 2008, 7:39 pm EST
Jason-
Well, at least you have enough humor remaining to make a joke of it. I get so tired of spam that it makes me grouchy.
Well, at least you have enough humor remaining to make a joke of it. I get so tired of spam that it makes me grouchy.
CaseyP on Feb 15, 2008February 15th, 2008, 5:00 am EST
neat-o! always wondered when i'd get to see someone banned. it's enough to make this grinch want her own web-site!
as a member of the fairer sex, i am simply amazed at the number of p3ni$ enlargement e-mails in my spam filter. two questions: since women think most about losing some weight, where are the weight-loss spam? and surely there is more on the average man's mind.
as a member of the fairer sex, i am simply amazed at the number of p3ni$ enlargement e-mails in my spam filter. two questions: since women think most about losing some weight, where are the weight-loss spam? and surely there is more on the average man's mind.
"You can observe a lot by watching." Yogi Berra
Taxon on Feb 15, 2008February 15th, 2008, 6:51 am EST
Casey-
Am hoping that Louis may be working up a poetic response to the subject, but my hopes frequently go unrewarded.
Am hoping that Louis may be working up a poetic response to the subject, but my hopes frequently go unrewarded.
CaseyP on Feb 15, 2008February 15th, 2008, 10:36 am EST
The spam in my box is hilarious
The senders are many and various
They promise me gold
And love-life most bold--
Just forget that it’s likely nefarious.
(Jason, it would have been better in haiku...)
The senders are many and various
They promise me gold
And love-life most bold--
Just forget that it’s likely nefarious.
(Jason, it would have been better in haiku...)
"You can observe a lot by watching." Yogi Berra
Troutnut on Feb 15, 2008February 15th, 2008, 12:46 pm EST
since women think most about losing some weight, where are the weight-loss spam?
I've got some I could forward you! Ho0d1a anyone?
(Jason, it would have been better in haiku...)
I disagree! That was the best limerick about spam that I've ever seen. This is why we have rules... :)
Jason Neuswanger, Ph.D.
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
Shawnny3 on Feb 16, 2008February 16th, 2008, 1:12 am EST
I agree - very nice the way it is, Casey. Well done. This has become a pretty good thread after all...
-Shawn
-Shawn
Jewelry-Quality Artistic Salmon Flies, by Shawn Davis
www.davisflydesigns.com
www.davisflydesigns.com
Jmd123 on Feb 18, 2008February 18th, 2008, 5:35 am EST
HA HA HA HA HA (LOL)!!!
Jonathon
Jonathon
No matter how big the one you just caught is, there's always a bigger one out there somewhere...
Jmd123 on Feb 18, 2008February 18th, 2008, 5:44 am EST
I get my email through work, which I can access at home. My company can afford the best spam blockers and virus detection software that I can't, so it tends to keep the junk-mail down - except for announcements like:
The 1st floor printer is down. Service has been called.
The 1st floor printer is back up again.
There is leftover food in the breakroom from today's lunch seminar.
Is someone exepcting a FedEx package? I have it at the front desk.
It's Engineer's Week at JJR!
Does someone want a pair of tickets to the game tonight?
etc. etc. etc.
The price I pay for blocking spam...
Jonathon
P.S. Don't waste your time on Viagra - it only lasts 4-6 hours. Try Cialis - 36 hours of potential hard-on! (Though if it lasts THAT long, you and your manhood are in BIG trouble...)
"SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM, SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM
Wonderful Spam, Wonderful Spam!!" - Monty Python
The 1st floor printer is down. Service has been called.
The 1st floor printer is back up again.
There is leftover food in the breakroom from today's lunch seminar.
Is someone exepcting a FedEx package? I have it at the front desk.
It's Engineer's Week at JJR!
Does someone want a pair of tickets to the game tonight?
etc. etc. etc.
The price I pay for blocking spam...
Jonathon
P.S. Don't waste your time on Viagra - it only lasts 4-6 hours. Try Cialis - 36 hours of potential hard-on! (Though if it lasts THAT long, you and your manhood are in BIG trouble...)
"SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM, SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM
Wonderful Spam, Wonderful Spam!!" - Monty Python
No matter how big the one you just caught is, there's always a bigger one out there somewhere...
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