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3. ice in my guides and blue winged olives

friday - march 25th

hey bruce, where do you wanna meet this morning?
i dunno, tony. how 'bout the big parking lot - say 8:30?
see you there.

ring ring - hello
hey matt, bruce and i are fishin' this weekend. want to meet us?
are you crazy, tony? it's freezing out. not supposed to go above 35 all weekend. and all that rain we got. i think i'll pass.
ok matt, but, you'll be sorry…

ring ring - hey tony, are you guys really going to go?
you betchya, louis. are you gonna use that "i've got papers to grade" excuse again?"
well, yeah and it's really cold and with all that rain and runoff …
ok louis, you'll be sorry...

holy cow, tony - it is really cold, and the water is really high, and running fast!
yes it is bruce, but look how clear it is.
i dunno, those baetis better be wearing stocking caps IF they hatch.
oh, they WILL hatch.

tony, i forgot a sweatshirt. maybe we should go down to the waffle shop and get breakfast first. there is a dollar store across the street from it. i'm sure i can get a sweatshirt there.
yeah, it is pretty cold (22 degrees) and nothing is gonna happen for a while.

hey tony, did we just eat sausage on a friday during lent?
oh, crap. maybe it's ok, jesus was a fisherman, i'm sure he'd understand.

bruce, look at those fish, in the shallow edge, in the sunlight, just hanging out, waiting to be spooked by a careless footstep.

i see 'em. maybe they're frozen. and they're all pretty small.
naw, i just saw one turn and take a nymph. that one right there is a foot at least. and bruce, please take the pricetag off of your new sweatshirt.

he ate it! look bruce, i told you it was a nice fish! took an unweighted baetis nymph. size 20.
he's only 8 inches. i told you they were small…
oh - hey tony, net this one for me. now that's a foot long. no babies for me… and he took an 18 weighted nymph from a little deeper water. maybe it's not so cold after all!
come on, bruce, every fourth cast i gotta clean the ice out of my guides.

hey, bruce, it's about 12:30, lets head down to this pool i know. WHEN the hatch starts, there WILL be rising fish there.
what are you, a fortune teller?
no, i'm a jedi.

hey tony, do you see all those baetis floating by? no rising fish. what size do you think they are?
probably a 20, maybe 18. just watch for a minute here. switch to a dry fly leader and tie on a baetis emerger. as soon as the shadow creeps out a little further, probably around 1:45, the first fish will rise right along that bank just above the tree with all of those exposed roots.
you're crazy. i'm doing pretty good nymphing. i'm stickin' with it.

hey bruce - did you see that?
are you on drugs?
no, just watch. there - he rose again.
well, i'll be a sonofabitch. i guess you are a jedi. i gotta change my leader.

come on bruce, hurry up. thats a half dozen.
it's so damn cold, i can't feel my fingertips to finish this knot. there, done. ok, i'm ready. tough drift. got to get it over those two current lanes with some slack in the tippett and drop it just above where he is. one more false cast…crap! i'm in that tree!
now you know why i rig two rods…

hey, tony, finally! and it's a good fish. all 14 inches of him. and look at those spots. beautiful. and, i'm not so cold anymore…

hey bruce, it's starting to wind down. it's 4:00 and i'm hungry.
you wimp! i still have a few risers up here.
well, have at it, i'll meet you in the parking lot. i'm frozen.

saturday, march 26th

hey tony, it's colder this morning than it was yesterday. lets drive into town and get some breakfast.
where do you want to go, bruce.
the waffle shop, of course. did you see that hostess yesterday? i wanna see if her sweater is just as tight today.
whatever… you bachelors are all alike. you know, i talked to matt and louis last night. they don't believe me. they just think we want them to come up and share the misery. oh, well…
they don't know what they're missing. that hostess is really cute.

let's nymph for a while and wait to get into that good pool in time for the hatch.
tony, you do realize that it's saturday, and there will probably be more fisherman out and about. somebody may be in that pool.
bruce, not a lot of people know what we know. there will be plenty of time to get in there.
i dunno, i'm gonna keep my dry fly leader on.
again, thats why i carry 2 rods.
what are you fishing?
a weighted sowbug with a baetis nymph dropper.
are you getting any?
a couple. not like it was yesterday.
i can't buy a fish. i'm having trouble with this set up. shoulda put on a proper leader, but, it's about that time. lets get to some dry fly water.
i'm right behind you.

holy cow, the hatch is heavier today than it was yesterday.
yeah, with this bright sun, you can really see how many bugs there are.
all those guys that didn't fish today because the bwo only hatch in shitty weather…

tony, it is tough fishing today. that sun must really let them see the flies better. very picky. you doing any good?
i've got a couple after i went up to a size 18 with really dark wings, but i've had way more refusals than takes. plus, i can't control my cast and drift as well as i could yesterday.
well, look at your rod. you've got ice in all of your guides.
wow, i didn't notice that. that explains something. i have never dry fly fished with ice in my guides before.

ring ring - hey tony, how's it going?
can't talk matt, i've got about a dozen fish rising in this pool and i'm trying to figure it out right now.
are you shittin' me?
no. i'm pretty frustrated right now. the hatch is better than yesterday and there are more fish rising, but i'm fooling fewer of them.
huh. good luck.
no words of wisdom?
no. you'll figure it out.
i doubt it…

hey bruce, i've had it. the hatch is about over and only four fish. i'm embarassed.
well tony, tomorrow's another day. i got slaughtered today, too. i'll meet you around noon tomorrow. after church. i gotta pray.

sunday march 27th

ring ring - shawn, i'm up here in your neck of the woods. wanna fish with me and bruce?
sure, i'll meet you guys around noon.
oh, and louis said that he may show up. when i told him how the fish and the hatch schooled me yesterday, his interest peaked. i think he likes a challenge.

hey bruce, i talked to shawn this morning and he's gonna meet us a little later. and louis told me that he may make it up here, too.
well, who else is coming? why not invite lefty while you're at it, so we can all crowd into one area?
there's plenty of water.
yeah, i'm just pissed about yesterday and then this morning, that hostess wasn't working at the waffle shop!

bruce, the hatch is starting a little earlier than yesterday. damn, there's a guy fishing our pool.
look at that fish taking emergers. he's not even casting to it. what the hell? he's leaving. well, i'm not complaining. lets get in there.

nice, bruce! what did he take?
a cripple. it's so cold, and there are so many bugs are on the water for such a long drift, that i think they're selecting the cripples.
duh? why didn't we think of that yesterday? nice job buddy.

what the hell? bruce, do you see that doofus coming down the trail towards us?
tony, what does he have on his head?
oh! hey louis. does elmer fudd know that you stole his hat?
you know, tony, i'm a southern gentleman and i'm not used to this cold weather.
you've been here 20 years. you gotta do better than that.
now, i don't have as much hair on my head as you two italians do, so i'm just being practical.
well, slide on in above us and get to fishin'
psst- bruce - don't tell him about the cripples, let him struggle for a while before we let him in on it…

bruce - i'm starting to get refusals, and i'm seeing some fish take emerging duns. i'm switching to a transitional.
same thing here. just got one on a loopwing.
damn, louis will figure it out...

shawn! great to see you! now put down that nymph rod and get in here. the hatch is just starting to get heavy.
i'm not as much of a dry fly guy as you are. maybe i'll nymph through the hatch.
nonsense. get in here, next to me. use this rod.
wow, that's a pretty long leader.
yeah, you need it to get the better drift across those multiple currents. make a few casts and see if you can spot the fly.

shawn, where did louis go?
i saw him heading back to his car to change rods as i was walking down to meet you guys.
well then, lets get you a fish before he gets back!

hey shawn, what did you get that last fish on?
louis, i got it on one of tony's emergers. they're starting to ignore it, though.
hey shawn, let me switch it to one with a darker wing. it will be tough to see in that shade, but they will take it better.
boy, louis i'm getting the guide treatment from tony today.

bruce, louis is just standing there staring at the water and the fish. i've seen him change flies twice, and he hasn't even made a cast.
maybe his brain is frozen?
will you just make a cast at that fish!
bruce, i'm waiting for the correct timing.
just cast it.
ok
wow - first cast and you got him. nice job.
thanks for making me do it' bruce.

well, it wasn't tricos, and it was really cold, but we had a ball.
thanks bruce for enjoying three days of misery with me - as usual.
and thanks louis and shawn for making it an even better time and for providing some comic relief.
matt - next time listen to your gut feeling, and remember, that when a jedi says that the fish will rise, they will rise.
the force is with me...

And as an added bonus, bruce penned a little song:


The Talkin' Walkin' BWO Blues



We was kickin’ the ice off our boots,

A 23-degree morning in this neck of the woods,

the waffle shop sounded a whole better,

blonds, brunette’s, hot coffee and tight sweaters,

but we had to get a movin’,

because we had them walkin’, talking’ BWO Blues.



We watched our breath as we pulled on our waders,

checked the calendar one more time thinkin’ it was later,

there’s a bird I yelled with a tassel cap on,

funny lookin’ thing we laughed, but he looked kind of warm,

listenin’ to the river pummeling the rocks,

we couldn’t give up on our day off,

because we still had them walkin’, talkin’ BWO Blues.



We picked up a few trout on nymphs, they was huggin’ the banks,

saw another my buddy claimed was 12 inches in length,

I told him if that fished reached 10 he’d be smilin’ for sure,

debated that for awhile and he never scored,

because we still had them walkin’, talking’ BWO Blues.



Our boys cried foul as we waded up to our waist,

we both spoke soprano as we squirmed in our place,

we talked about those guys things as we tend to do,

including spittin’ and swearing and off color news,

but know one was carin’ about senseless views,

because we still had them walkin’, talkin’ BWO Blues.



The mayflies took turns tryin’ to break through the surface,

they carried hatchets and knives, they showed up with a purpose,

no rises yet as I stood behind a tree,

seemed like a solid time to take a good pee,

because we still had those walkin’, talkin’ BWO Blues.



My buddy saw a riser and jug a brown in the breeze,

I dug out my camera as he posed on his knees.

To the water in a flash, excuse the pun, will ya’,

I fired a few memories of a fish with great hue

We was takin’ care of those walking’, talkin BWO Blues.



I jumped back into the water and the boys weren’t too happy,

but the risers were everywhere lookin’ right at me.

I gave a mighty back cast came forward to fast,

my fly dangled in the trees, I nearly fell on my ass.

I did that once more before I learned my lesson,

chasin’ those walking’, talking’ BWO Blues.

Hilarious.

All that was missing was an electric fence to warm us up.

By the way, I noted that I was the only one not shivering when we headed up to the cars. Me an Elmer know how to keep the ears warm! Not to mention the shiny bowling ball up top.

Now come Monday evening I'll want to know if Bruce or Tony got a hook in that 16" fish I caught last Friday. I told you where he lives and what he eats, so the pressure's on. :)

Thanks, guys, for a great trip. Now where does one buy that ice off paste?

I'll go ahead and rep the opposite end of the spectrum - yesterday it was 90 degrees (and we're not getting any spring showers either). Had some 90 degree days in March too. Not exactly trout weather. Could be a long summer down here if March/April are any kind of indication...

That's TEJAS for ya, man. I bet those bluebonnets and Indian paintbrushes sure look pretty, though! Right now here in Oscoda we are getting SNOW.

Go hit the San Marcos - the water temp. stays about 70F year-round.

As for you PA guys, I think Cabin Fever has gotten the best of you. Then again, you've caught trout and I haven't. Opener here is April 30th, and it might even be warm by then!

Jonathon

Nice account, Tony. My favorite line from our day came after Louis finally hooked and landed a few fish after a long and frustrating period of near catches and misses. Tony implied that Louis's newfound success was due to Tony's having shaken up a few of his caught fish and then pointing them, discombobulated, in Louis's direction. Louis: "I'll thank you not to shake my fish anymore! That's probably why they've been missing my flies for the past hour!"

After Tony finally packed it in, the funniest moment of the day took place. But the tiny shred of class I have precludes me from mentioning the vigor with which Louis tried to long-release his last fish, which in spite of Louis's best efforts to roll-cast him into the trees was hell-bent on coming to hand.

Fun times, gentlemen. I look forward to the next time.

-Shawn

Excellent use of the classical device of "occupatio" in your last sentence, Shawn.

The little devil just didn't want to fly.

No attempt at occupatio was consciously made (had to look that one up, though, to be sure). Apophasis, though, certainly.

You did your best to persuade him. And that's all one could expect.

-Shawn

Thanks, Shawn, but I prefer the Oxford English Dictionary definition of occupatio to the Wikipedia one. The OED equates occupatio with preterition. Being schooled in Renaissance literature, I somewhat favor either Latin term to the Greek parasiopesis (or paralepsis) anyway. Below is the first OED definition for preterition:

preterition, n.

1. Rhetoric. A figure in which attention is drawn to something by professing to omit it; an instance of this.
a1602 W. Perkins Cloud of Faithfull Witnesses (1607) 493 This hee doth, by a Rhetoricall preterition or passing ouer, called in Schooles, Paralepsis.
1619 W. Sclater Expos. 1 Thess. (v. 1-2) 386 Such Ironicall preteritions are something frequent in Scripture.
1656 J. Smith Myst. Rhetorique 165 Preterition is a kind of an Irony, and is when you say you let passe that which notwithstanding you touch at full.
1728 E. Chambers Cycl. (at cited word), The most artful Praises are those given by way of Preterition.
1943 J. T. Shipley Dict. World Lit. 41/1 Pretending to shield or conceal while really displaying: Parasiopesis; also called preterition.
1989 C. Fuentes & A. MacAdam tr. C. Fuentes Christopher Unborn (1990) iv. viii. 193 The otherness of a literature that was being produced, metonymically, at the level of syntagmatic structure, but which also, semantically, in successive preteritions constituted substantive constellations.
1995 N.Y. Rev. Bks. 19 Oct. 52/1 She adapts another historical novelist's ploy, one which reminds us of Umberto Eco's remark that the favorite rhetorical trope of the historical novelists is preterition, i.e., saying that you are not going to say something and thereby saying it.

Point well taken, but don't forget I have to take whatever opportunity presents itself to get a snarky dig in on Shawn. I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop now.

Fishing with Louis is always educational, though not always in the ways one might anticipate. Thank you, Louis, for each of the varied things I learned from you on this trip.

-Shawn

Oh, taking the high road to make me look bad, eh? Well, I'll have to concede to superior maneuvering this time, Shawn. But there will be a next time.

I don't know that anyone's ever accused me of taking the high road, Louis. I was just being sincere - I've never seen anyone land a fish quite that way before...

-Shawn